Annmarie Rita as her family knew her

Annmarie Rita was a mother, a grandmother, a former MIT lab technician, and a recognizable face on the South Coast and in Wareham, where she and her daughter spent happy times fishing before her mind was ravaged by the effects of multiple sclerosis and a brain tumor. And before she was homeless.

As often as so many saw her, many didn't know her, and in the wake of her death, her family is filling in some of the blanks.

Rita, who was struck and killed by a car while attempting to cross Cranberry Highway on Wednesday, May 22, could be often seen lugging her large backpack around town for the past decade or so.

She grew up in Waltham, but her daughter, Jessica Bruno, says that her connection to the Wareham area goes back far further than many realize.

"We lived in Onset for awhile when I was a teenager," said Bruno. "It was such a special place to her. She took me fishing all the time as a kid there."

Bruno believes that was what led Rita to make the area her home.

"It was an area that held a lot of good memories for her," Bruno said. "I'd like to come there and spread some of her ashes there."

Annmarie gave birth to Bruno when she was 20 years old, and Bruno recalls her mother's health problems beginning when she was a teenager, although she says that being as young as she was, she didn't know or understand the full extent of those problems.

"She always kind of had her underlying problems. She really did try, but then things didn't go the best for her," Bruno said.

Annmarie's cousin, Johanna "Yogi" Szabo-Blenkhorn, said that she and Rita grew up on Ricky's Farm in Waltham, picking radishes and taking care of horses. They went to high school together and eventually lived together, raising their kids as two single mothers.

"We had a ball, oh my God," said Blenkhorn. "She made the best homemade gnocchis I ever had. ... She made everything by hand nothing came out of a can."

Rita told many of the people who stopped to speak with her in Wareham that she once worked at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, and while some may have had their doubts, Blenkhorn confirms that she did work there in the 1980s.

"She worked at MIT in Lexington Mass. She was a technology lab engineer," said Blenkhorn. "She lived with me, and when she showed me her check, I almost [expletive] my pants."

Rita did things her own way, and according to Blenkhorn, was unofficially married to a woman long before gay marriage was legalized in Massachusetts.

"If you're gay, be proud of it. Don't hang your head in shame," said Blenkhorn. "That's how Annemarie and I felt, and that's what we taught our children."

Bruno says that she wasn't sure what possessed her to do it, but she searched for her mother's name in an online search engine a few years back, and stumbled across an article about her in the New Bedford Standard-Times.

They briefly reunited, but didn't establish a lasting relationship.

"I tried to reconnect with her, tried to give her help, but she wanted her freedom -- even if that meant being homeless and living that way," said Bruno.

Bruno gave her photos of her granddaughters, and hoped that the girls would have the chance to meet their grandmother but, unfortunately, it was not to be.

"I gave her my cell phone number and never changed it hoping she would reach out," Bruno said. "I was always worried I would get one of those phone calls, but I didn't think it would be like this."

According to Blenkhorn, Rita suffered from multiple sclerosis, and had a brain tumor, but she was not one to seek medical attention.

"They found a tumor in her brain and she ended up walking out of the hospital," said Blenkhorn. "We were brought up, you don't depend on anyone you take care of yourself. She didn't want to burden Jessica."

The degenerative effects of multiple sclerosis on her brain and the effects of the brain tumor soon became too much for Rita's partner to handle, and they separated.

Blenkhorn says that mental illness also runs in the family, and after a particularly upsetting public incident, her son --- who suffers from bipolar disorder -- said he'd rather be maimed than deal with the illness.

"He said he'd rather have a leg or arm amputated because people can understand  a disability they can see with their eyes," Blenkhorn said. "We're just fun-loving people who had a lot of tragedy in our family."

Blenkhorn said that if people learn anything from Rita's life and the unexpected twists and turns it took, it should be that it can happen to anyone -- no matter how "together" a person may think their life is -- and everybody can stand to be a bit more kind to one another.

"Never make fun of anybody," Blenkhorn said, "because you don't know where your life is going to end up at the end of the day."

Services for Annmarie Rita will be held Saturday, June 1, at 10 a.m. at St. Anthony's Church, 851 Main Street in Woburn. Bruno says the public is welcome to attend.